19 years old and married to a wonderful husband. We just bought our first house. My first year out of college. Working long and tiring hours at an Foreclosure Law Firm. My dream was to become a lawyer growing up, but I decided to go to college and get my Legal Admin Degree from King's College. I graduated at the top of my class and with a typing speed of 73 wpm. Spring came along with wonderful temperatures. We had big dreams with landscaping. So we both took time off of work, and devoted our time and attention to our back yard. We planted several types of flowers and iron border around 4 of our big oak trees in the back. Neither one of us had ever did landscaping or use machinery to do it. It turn out beautiful!! We were very proud of ourselves. We were very tired and in pain!!! My pain stay longer than Darrel's, we just thought I worked muscles I never had used before. The pain would go away and come back with a vengeance. I would get to the point of not being able to open soda bottles. Envelopes was the worst. Most embarrassing was not able to dress myself, or open the shower door. Turning the light switch on was becoming difficult to do. I made a Dr's apt , just to see what was going on. I was thinking working in the yard was not a good idea. The Dr. told me I just pull a muscle. Gave me some Ib 800 and muscle relaxers. Two weeks later, the pain was getting worse. I was having a hard time grasping the steering wheel to drive to work. One of my job duties at work was copying and filing. Which took half of my day. Work was getting harder, and stressful. With every step I took, my body would just fall apart. Sleeping was becoming a nightmare, and the fatigue was awful. Darrel made me go back to the dr once again. Dr. Wagner (which is one of the worst drs. ever) started saying it was in my head. Well, we knew it wasn't in my head. I was in sever pain. So a week later, we made another dr. appt with Dr. Barron. Which is the greatest doctor ever. She asked questions. One of the main questions was: does anyone have any autoimmune disease in your family. At this time, the only that had any thing was my decease grandmother. My grandmother Jackson died of Lupus. Dr. Barron drew blood to run different test. A week later, I received a call to come back in to discuss my blood work. Rheumatoid Arthritis normally tests for 30 and below and my blood work came back at 753. This is not the type of Arthritis you can just take Tylenol and go on with your life. Please take the time and read what RA is about:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rheumatoid_arthritis
Besides of dealing with pain, you have to start medication asap. RA medications are some of the worse medications you can ever take. I have been on 3 medications that are consider Chemo drugs. One of the worse, and most common is Methotraxte. Once a week you take 8 pills at the same time. The side effects are horrible as all other chemo drugs. Hair loss, nausea, fatigue and dizziness. So I always made sure I took this med on the weekends. Eventually, I was no longer able to take methotraxate orally, and started giving myself injections, which subsided the side affects. Predisone is the drug you love to hate. Predisone seems like it makes all your pain goes away, but the long term affects are horrible. At this time I didn't worry with predisone side affects I was happy to move and feel like a normal 19 year old. Then came, Vioxx, Mobic, Motrin 800, Hydrocodone. The more you try to do, the worse the pain is. The more you lay around, the more people talk about how lazy you are. With all medications comes a consequence. I eventually left my job as a Legal Admin, and I went from job to job. Until I could find one that was suited for my body and my lifestyle. At this point the RA was moving at a fast pace. So we decided now was the time to try to have kids. Reason #1-I have to be off all meds except predisone while trying to get pregnant at least 1 year prior to trying. So that is another year of excuriating pain without medications. Then add in another 4 years of trying to get pregnant. Any type of stress causes Flare Ups. Flare Ups = EMEMY. I am now working at a bank. Eventhough, it is not my degree, I love it. But: I had limitations. I did not open the ATM envelopes, I did not carry coin boxes, or Cash Trays. I did not stand up for a long period of time, and I did not sit down for a long period time. So when new people started, I will have to ask for help. Hey can you carry this box of pennies for me. They look at me like I am crazy. I will explain that I have RA. Oh, my granny has Arthritis. (TOTALLY DIFFERENT) But since I was overweight, everyone automatically assume I was being lazy. Lazy is not the definition. RA is a disabilities disease. When I can't lift my arm to grab a teller tub out of the machine, or key in checks b/c my fingers lock up. Or can't get out of my seat because I can't move my hips. Laziness is not the problem. What I would give up just to be able to stand in a line for more than 2 mins without being in pain.
Finally in June of 2005 we find out we are expecting!! It was long, hard struggle for us to get pregnant. Seem like everyone was getting pregnant around us. My Rheumatolgoist did not agree with me trying to get pregnant. Even family members did not understand us wanting a baby so bad. No one knows what Darrel and I went through to get pregnant, all of the heartaches. The false positive tests, the RA being out of controlled. At that time it was the worst emotional roller coaster I have ever been on.
August 2005 we had our first internal ultrasound. That is when we found out we were having twins. Twins is consider high risk, having RA and being pregnant with Twins was a double high risk. I had the best pregnancy ever. We gave birth by C-section on Feb 17th 2006 too 2wonderful boys. But who would had thought, that within one week. The unimaginable flare up of all time came aboard. I swear to this day, it has not left!!!
Now I am going to a new Rheummy. I have been dx with Fibro, TMS, and depression. I am on Remicade, Predison 50 mgs, Mobic, Hydrocodne, and Xanax for the anexity I was facing. I would do anything to prevent the pain. Carrying around two babys all day with colic was not good for the body. Enventually, I am moved to Enbrel injections. Then to Rituxain infusions (6) hour infusion. Then to Orencia Infusion. yes as you guess, my body and RA drugs do not mixed very well. So at this point I switch to another dr. I am on 90 mgs of predisone nightly. It is year 2008. I have a bone scan done. I have OA in my spine and hip areas. <---Predisone side affect. I have Cushing's syndrome from predisone. I have heart palpation's from Predisone. I have inflammatory stomach lining due to predisone and motrin. I also have a Handicapp Sign. Yes the stares I get when I use it. I do not abuse the sign, I use it, when I need it. I am learning to get over my fears and embarrasment of using the sign. Now we are here on today dates. It is August 25th 2010. I have been awake now for 24 hours. I can't sleep, b/c it hurts to bad. I have had this awful disease for 9 years. My twenty's was supposed to be the best time of my life, but it was a painful time. I know this is a pity party. But I think it is time for people to understand what a person life with RA is. I do have good days. I cherished those good days. But believe me, my body will pay for those good days. If I go shopping, Darrel is prepared for me to come straight home and go to bed. And this can last until the following day. Ra has nothing to do with weight, skinny people get it too. So look at me being overweight and think I am lazy. I am mostly overweight due to medications. And it is hard to work out with RA. If you really want to know what RA is please read the following spoon story: http://www.inspire.com/groups/stop-sarcoidosis/discussion/the-spoon-theory-read-this-youll-be-glad-you-did/
So the time finally came where the boys are starting Pre-K. I guess this is the same to me as it is for kids starting Kindergarten. Karson and Jackson are going to a public school that has 9 pre school classes. It is the only school in North Carolina that has a 5 star rating. So it was obvious we wanted our children to go to Walter Bickette Education Center. We prayed for our the decision rather or not to separate the boys. Most people wants twins separated so they can have their own "identity". As most of you know, my boys are their own unique person. They do not share that "twin" stereotype. They already have their own friends and they are not attached to each other. So I totally think it should be up to the parent rather or not to separate, not the school or other people opions. The reason why we separated was for the fact that the boys tend to fight amongst themselves than with anyone else. And we did not want competition b/t the boys. So therefore they are in different classes. That was the hardest part for me. I want to be able to be involved with there classes, but I did not want child feel left out.
6 years ago
